When we meet a man or woman we feel love towards, the initial feeling is of elation and joy. But soon we are unable to hold that joy and elation. Each partner starts to control the other. Each wants different needs to be met by the other. Soon it is not about the elation and joy of coming together in love, but about how to knead the other into a dough of one’s own consistency.
To be able to walk away from this need to knead the dough soft or hard, is what nurturing a loving relationship is all about. Stop, walk away for a while, re-look at why you were wanting to be with this person in the first place. If you still feel that the deepest intention is to love and care for the other person and in return be loved and cared for, then stay or else move on.
The stickiness of a dough is determined by the HOW of wanting to love and care for a person and equally by the HOW of desiring the same in return. Be clear. One might want emotional stability in the relationship, the other might just want physical intimacy. Or one might want both and the other not.
Make the right choices for yourself. You have every right to want it all. If your present relationship is not deeply satisfactory in providing you what you truly need and desire then say so and wait and see if the other is willing to walk that path with you. If you get a sense that it is not what the other wants then say a loving goodbye and walk away. Or if your need to be with this person is very important for your well being even if you do not get more or less of what you want, and still cannot do without this person then…happily accept and be at peace.
Just remember you have a choice at all times. And you are not a victim.